The Three Most Important Soft Skills You Can Develop

a meeting of the UPAA Board in Arizona

Hard skills are the technical abilities and knowledge needed to perform a job. Driving a car is a complex skill, for example. On the other hand, soft skills are personal traits that are just as important. If you are not the driver, for example, be a polite, patient, and helpful passenger.

Soft skills are becoming essential in the workplace. Together with good hard skills, you will have more skills than your colleagues and stand out. Three became extremely helpful when I sought to develop them.

The Three Most Important Soft Skills

Here are the top three soft skills that can help immensely:

Effective Communication

Clear and concise communication is the foundation of successful relationships and collaboration. It delivers what you intend to say well, avoids misunderstandings, and builds trust.

It includes paying full attention, clarifying issues, and providing constructive feedback. It also necessitates using simple language, avoiding jargon, and tailoring the message to the recipient.

Lastly, it is helpful to remember that non-verbal communication strengthens or detracts from your words. Body language, tone of voice, and facial expressions should not convey the opposite.

Problem-solving and Critical Thinking

We are brought into the workplace to do routine tasks and solve problems when they arise. Analyzing problems, identifying solutions, and making informed decisions is a big part of the job.

First, it demonstrates initiative. Brainstorming to generate a variety of ideas and solutions is a first step. It includes gathering sufficient data and evaluating information for decision-making.

Second, it means being able to adapt to change. Flexibility and openness to new ideas and approaches will help you find your way through analyzing problems and finding solutions.

Emotional Intelligence

This soft skill is crucial to building solid relationships and prospering in challenging situations. It involves understanding and managing your emotions while doing the same for others.

It requires self-awareness of how emotions usually influence behavior. It also requires empathy, understanding the feelings of others, and putting oneself in their shoes.

In addition, it means developing healthy coping mechanisms during stressful situations. While emotions are still poorly understood or managed, such situations can arise.

How to Develop These Soft Skills

NCR, IBM, and SGV-Accenture trained me well in hard skills. Fortunately, they also included basic training programs for soft skills. I tried to grow them more by joining organizations, attending special soft skills training programs, and reading books.

Joining Organizations

To improve my public speaking skills, I joined the Toastmasters program. This ongoing workshop helps people develop confidence, clarity, and persuasiveness in oral communication. The program also gives much practice time for active listening, nonverbal communication, and conciseness. Most of the lessons apply to all types of communication. Being concise has helped my writing.

Both the debate format and the table topics (for impromptu thinking) became vital in developing problem-solving and critical-thinking skills. Evaluating others’ speeches and program participants was a weekly opportunity to practice emotional intelligence.

Aside from Toastmasters, other organizations, including those I was allowed to lead and a couple I even founded, gave me more opportunities to practice all three soft skills. I recommend joining groups like alumni associations, industry associations, or groups in a parish.

Attending Helpful Training Programs

There are special workshops that provide more than the essential soft skills training programs offered by companies. If you can, look for special programs on:

Informed Decision-Making

Creative Thinking

Thinking Outside the Box

Structured Problem-Solving Techniques (such as root-cause analysis, mind mapping, or decision trees)

Mindfulness and Meditation (Stress Management)

Assertiveness Training (the Middle between Aggression and Passivity)

When you choose a training program, consider your learning style, goals, and budget. Also, select those led by experienced trainers. Finally, make sure you spend your time and money on those that provide opportunities for practice and feedback as part of the program.

Reading Books

Reading articles and books is my go-to learning style. Reading allows me to take as much time as I need to mull over the ideas presented in the comfort of my chair or bed.

I asked Gemini to name the best book for each soft skill. Here is what the Google AI app gave me:

1. "How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk" by Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish. This classic book may focus on communication with children, but the lessons apply to all relationships.

2. "Think Like a Freak: The Radical Economics of Everyday Life" by Steven D. Levitt and Stephen J. Dubner. This book challenges conventional thinking and encourages readers to approach problems from new perspectives.

3. "Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ" by Daniel Goleman. This groundbreaking book explores the importance of emotional intelligence and offers practical strategies for developing it.

But I was most pleased with Gemini's last recommendation. As I mentioned in my article on personal branding, the book was my Bible when I was working in the Philippines.

Stephen Covey's "The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People" offers timeless principles for self-awareness, empathy, and effective communication. I read and reread the book and was even asked to deliver talks about it.

By developing these three essential soft skills, you will be better equipped to succeed in your career. They will help you build strong relationships with superiors, colleagues, and clients in whatever size of a setting.