OLA: Lending a Father, Missing a Husband

Suzanne's exercise machine

Suzanne' sent this card to me

Bill arrived yesterday, November 23, he had been gone since Oct. 28. Suzanne, his second child and first daughter, had hip surgery the day after his arrival. The doting father took Devin and Cassie to school and back, cooked meals, and generally kept the house in order while she was in recovery. Suzanne loved that I lent him Bill and sent me a card that said, 'More herds can't express my gratitude.'

Just when Bill was to come home, she suffered pulmonary embolisms in both lungs, an unfortunate complication of surgery, being hugely immobile for a long period of time as well as owing to genetics (see Bill’s own bout with it on http://rvcruisinglifestyle.blogspot.com/2013/08/ola-getting-fun-food-and-more-all-in.html ). Bill extended his stay for four days until the weekend when the thanksgiving holiday will give the famly more time to take care for her.At least he got home in time for my birthday!

Bill being picked up by the shuttle

Suzanne's goodies for Bill

Yes, Bill is a good father. But he is also a good husband. I missed him but I knew how to cope with the situation. Before he left, I asked him to take me to the Oriental Store. I bought all that I needed for a walk down a Filipino culinary memory lane: daing na bangus, pinangat na isda, paksiw na isda, escabeche, ginisang patola, ginisang ampalaya, ginisang upo, chicken tinola, beef bulalo, each one four times, dishes I have missed a lot. For breakasts, I alternated pan de sal with red eggs or coco jam, champorado, and congee. Every day was a Filipino Feast.

                                                                                         

ginisang ampalaya (sauteed bitter gourd)

Last January/February, the first draft of my book was completed when Bill also spent a month with his eldest child Jim in Boise, Idaho while they were preparing a portion of the 16,000 sq. ft. property, which they were paid for a case they won, to be used as their office. This time around, I also found the time to complete my edit of the manuscript. I have now sent a copy each to Suzanne and Claudine, my second child, for their review. As soon as they finish their reviews (Bill has done his), the manuscript will go to a professional editor. Then it may conceivably be ready to be published!

daing na isda (deep fried marinated milkfish)

escabeche (sweet and sour fish)

In addition, I have been able to create my new FB account, dissociating it from Bill’s and rebuilding my own base. I have also created our website, The Cruising Lifestyle, at gocruisinglifestyle.com, and our FB business page, The Cruising Lifestyle. These are all being prepared for a stronger online platform with a brand. My present platform now consists of a blog with 250,000+ views and a FB page with 1,500 friends. I have yet to work on my twitter and LinkedIn pressence. I am told that the blog should have about 30,000 views a month (the highest I have gotten was 22,500) and a FB business page at 3.000 Likes (0 so far!). So I have both an intensive editing period and a long marketing campaign to go before my target date of June 2014 book release!

bulalo (stewed beef shanks)

Then it was during this hiatus that the Haiyan tragedy struck the Philippines (please see my post http://rvcruisinglifestyle.blogspot.com/2013/11/wow-responding-to-disaster.html). Bill, my children and I were able to coordinate our donations. Although each of us had contributed separately to relief efforts (Bill donated to the UN World Food Programme USA), April got us to focus on the rebuilding efforts by contributing as a family to Gawad Kalinga. For just P20,000, one house could be rebuilt for a displaced family. They all donated their Christmas gifts from me to the fund. In addition, Deejay, husband of my first-born Trisha, designed a Tshirt (Help. Hope. Heal.). If he sells 50 of them, another house can be rebuilt. Please go to https://www.booster.com/help-hope-heal?share=6721384979451411.

Help. Hope. Heal

Bud's birthday @ Sourdough Pizza

Finally, our new friends on the block took care of me as Bill asked them to. Once Bonnie brought me to the grocery for some needed pantry items.We also went out for Bud's, Bonnie's husband, birthday at Sourdough Pizza very near Viewpoint.

Suzanne and her crutches

Suzanne got Bill for a month and I missed him for just a tiny part of that (hehehe). My book project got the push it needed. I also thoroughly enjoyed my walk down a Filipino culinary memory lane! And we were able to, from around the world, help in the relief efforts of central Philippines. Although I rarely saw the light of day, except for my daily walks to the Fitness Center, it was a very productive time for both Bill and me.  

WOW: Responding to Disaster

taking care of those who perished: more than 3,600 with 1,200 still missing

saving what's left

Last Sunday I published my usual weekly post on my blog. It was about ‘Choosing Club Memberships for Social Growth’, third in a series of how Bill and I are getting settled at Viewpoint RV Golf and Tennis Resort in Phoenix, Arizona. Little did I know that a ‘perfect storm in terms of its sheer size, its circular symmetry and the tightness of its eye’ had set a world record and, the day before, hit hard Leyte and Samar, the third poorest province in the Philippines (poverty incidence at 59.4%). How insensitive of me, to focus on the comforts and luxury of resort living while countless people suffered back home! A rightful nudge by my friend June Lopez and concerned inquiries by neighbors, family, and friends woke me. 

looking for what they have lost

The status updates on Facebook at the time started with praises about the surprisingly good disaster preparedness, compared to previous calamities. The Philippines has one of the highest incidences of natural disaters in the world. But when news trickled in about the real situation, the status updates changed overnight. The extent of the devastation was slowly revealed and now authorities count over 3,600 dead, 1,200 still missing,12,500 injured, and 600,000 displaced. The emotional response is overwhelming. The US takes the lead in what is projected to be the third highest disaster aid in its history, behind the Haitian earthquake and the Indonesian tsunami. (http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation/2013/11/13/donations-typhoon-stricken-philippines/3508929/). That is not even counting heroic help from US military.

helping themselves

Being 10,000 miles away, all Bill and I could do was to donate money to a reputable agency, the UN’s World Food Programme USA. And then we saw how a friend, Monette Hamlin, purchased 10 water filtration systems for help that has significant multiplier effect; how another friend, Jennifer Simons, pioneered in the relief efforts for those who were evacuated to Manila; or how the brother of a friend, Orly Tugob, reveled in the exercise he freely got as he carried heavy relief goods in Tacloban. So many inspiring stories in the face of adversity were shared in media, social or mainstream. Even Anderson Cooper finally admitted that he was amazed at the extraordinary strength of the Filipino people (http://au.ibtimes.com/articles/522424/20131115/haiyan-anderson-cooper-philippines-strength-extraordinary.htm#.Uoa02MSsiSo).

much needed water

And then, in the midst of the chaos that is natural in disaster scenarios, negativity found its way into people’s psyche.  Leaders began to get bashed for perceived incompetence, people began to criticize journalists’ reports, and looting was blamed on negligent law enforcement officers. My daughter April, tucked away in Newcastle upon Tyne in England, wrote an inspiring appeal on her Facebook page, which she followed with concrete informational help, for us to focus on positive things. Similarly, Bobbi Jo Domingo, a colleague from Development Academy of the Philippines, wanted to raise the level of discussion to something more fruitful. This is my small contribution towards their cry.

the Filipino rises every single time

I hope that the five basics of disaster response continue to be taken care of: early evacuation, emergency medical help, accessibility of food and water, improvised shelter, and infrastructure for better distribution and communication. It is also always good to remember the truism that staying with the positive will beget more positives. But the Philippines cannot escape from looking into the future for disaster risk reduction. If we do not have any experts in the science of disaster management, it will be worth our while to send scholars since such degrees are already being offered, as a matter of course, in American schools of higher learning. Hopefully, lessons learned are institutionalized in a powerful National Institution. Lastly, we can only be proud of economic gains if they are spread more evenly so that no more Filipinos have to live in shaky shoddy shanties by the sea, ready to be wiped out by the next big storm or gobbled up by the next big earthquake (http://ideas.time.com/2013/11/14/stop-catastrophizing-relief-efforts-in-the-philippines/).