5 Things My Husband and I Practice in Retirement to Keep Us Young

 

This article was first published in Travel Awaits. I have updated it here.

A 2017 article from AARP says that people over 65 think that “old” means being closer to 74. Well, my husband is turning 80 in two months, and I turned 75 two months ago! Luckily, people tell us we look young! I am Asian so that may be a reason, but my husband is Caucasian. The secret must be something we are doing together. Here are some possible explanations.

1. Keeping An 8-Hour Day

After we married, he sold his business, I retired from teaching at the university, and we went on an 8-year honeymoon running around North America in an RV. In other words, we postponed “settling down.”

Every day became an adventure. For me, it consisted of an hour at the fitness center (we always selected campgrounds with one), an hour of cooking, 4 to 6 hours of visiting one or two landmarks in the area, and an hour of journaling about them. He took care of maintaining the RV and made time for sports.

When we finally settled down, we chose ViewPoint Golf Resort, a 55+ active community. My day changed to 2 hours of social media and writing, an hour at the fitness center (including hot tub and sauna), an hour of cooking, 2 hours at clubs (computer, photography, karaoke, writing/editing, dancing, and poker clubs), an hour at the library, and an hour of arts. He continued in sports and joined me at the gym and library.

In both phases, weekends were devoted to preparing for the coming week, planning meals, shopping for groceries, doing other errands, and going to church. It was a smooth transition from working to “retiring.” Our weekdays remained as full 8-hour days, and our weekends stayed the same. The only difference is that we do what we want to do, not things we have to do. So if we even get stressed, it's the good kind...the one that comes with great satisfaction.

2. Creating More Special Days

To disrupt this routine, we created special days. And they didn’t have to be on the weekends. Weekdays are usually better because there are no crowds at movies, malls, or travel destinations. There are movies we must see in theaters, not just for theater popcorn but for the grand experience, especially during Oscar season. Classics at the Hale Theater have become part of our to-dos. To give my husband a break from my “excellent” cooking, we carefully research and pick exceptional places for both ambiance and cuisine to celebrate special occasions like birthdays, Easter, Mother/Father’s Days, anniversaries, Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Year.

And travel days are always special days. They sneak in throughout the year. Day trips to parks are rites of renewal, especially during blooming spring days. Summer sees us road-tripping to the homes of our children and grandchildren. Fall is the time for attending conferences or visiting new places to write about. And then we spend 3 months of winter in Mexico when Phoenix gets "too cold."

3. Living with Lots of Fun and Laughter

Socializing is a key part of corporate life, and it does not have to stop in retirement. At ViewPoint, we not only join clubs, but we also love hosting dinners, get-togethers, and parties. We added a large sunroom so we can have a better entertainment area.

During COVID, I switched to the Pro version of Zoom so I could host more and longer sessions. Now that we can again meet in person, my mahjong sessions with friends have resumed. So have the Friday dinners at home. And on our birthdays and Christmas/New Year, we host bigger parties. These socials are venues for a lot of fun and laughter.

And there are other ways to feel giddy and laugh. Although the urban myth that children laugh more than adults has been debunked, I still love being around children. It’s an absolute thrill to be with our grandkids. We seek younger (than us) souls to experience diverse interests and senses of humor. Finally, we have turned more and more to comedies.

4. Taking Care Of Health

I cannot emphasize this enough. In the first place, poor health will do the opposite of what we want: cut short our retirement days and make us look older than our biological age. There are several parts to this: exercise, nutrition, sleep, hydration, and grooming.

ViewPoint has three fitness centers, one of which is just six houses away from us. At times my husband succeeds in making me walk or hike with him. At other times, I succeed in making him walk the mall with me (with some shopping benefits).

But what we put inside our tummies makes the most difference. Since I am in control of the kitchen, my husband has gone with my flow. Our nutrition plan is based on three principles: portion management (don’t cook huge batches), diversity (don’t repeat anything in a month), and availability (don’t have in the house what you should not consume). And I have since joined the Longevity movement (more on this in a later article).

And then, of course, there is sleep and hydration. My Fitbit tells me my sleep score when I wake up, and I deliberately slow my day on a low score. I also try to drink a lot of water and cap my day with a large cup of chamomile tea with honey and vanilla.

We can also enhance our look by good grooming well. Wear colors that suit your complexion, cuts that complement your body, hairstyles that go well with your face, accessories that finish a look, and make-up that highlights or hides.

5. Living With a Purpose

But it’s something much deeper than the physical that will truly make the difference. Mental and spiritual health is sustained by living a life of purpose. I have found that helping others and not getting paid for it is far more fulfilling than just being useful. There are so many who need help, who cannot provide for themselves, or who need just a little push to make their lives better.

My first volunteer activity was at the Service Corps of Retired Executives (SCORE) to help small businesses that were just starting and did not yet have the means to pay for advice. The right tips can put them over the hump. My husband volunteered as a CASA, a court-appointed special advocate, who tries to save children from the grip of highly dysfunctional families and the trap of easy money, crime, and incarceration. Some focused attention is all they need.

My desire to meet Filipinos in America led me to fellow alumni of the University of the Philippines. We founded the UP Alumni Association in Arizona, and today we are supporting at least two scholars in the Philippines to graduate and help the country. The UP Alumni Association in America to which we are affiliated supports even more students.

In other words, looking and feeling young comes from a full life borne out of an openness to diverse experiences. Have full days, create special days, and fill them with fun and laughter. And don’t forget to take care of your health and live a life of purpose.

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